Publishing a Book is Terrifying

On Friday, I received the email from my publisher that said we are officially out of production

and on to printing for Diamonds in Auschwitz.

How do you think I responded?

A. Fainted dead away. I’m just now waking up and went straight to my computer to type

this up.

B. Jumped for joy and called my bestie to share the good news.

C. Staggered a bit, sat on the closest option (the stairs), and fought back tears.

The answer is C.

The real question is – was I fighting back tears of happiness? Not really. I think it was a mixture

of relief and paranoia.

Writing a book is hard.

Publishing a book is terrifying.

While I was in the production stage of this journey, it was easy for me to focus on one task at a

time, while the gray cloud of terror and worries was held back. Add a character and change the

ending a bit (don’t think about the terror). Check. Proofread the manuscript for the seventh

time (don’t think about the terror). Check check. Choose a cover design, pick the narrator for

the audio book, interview publicists (don’t think about the terror). Check check check.

When I had actionable items to check off my list, this entire process has been exciting. But we

are nearing the end of items to complete and the terror is looming.

What is the terror?

What if no one likes my book? Follow-up terrors: what if no one reads it/buys it? They’re all

related.

As of Friday, with that email from my wonderful editorial team at Greenleaf Book Group, I’ve

run out of production check list items. I’m on to promoting, and I can’t avoid the cloud of terror

any longer. Promoting Diamonds in Auschwitz is all about people reading, buying, liking my

book.

What if no one does?

This is not a plug for people to chime in here and say things like of course, people will like your

book or you’ve worked so hard, you should be proud. I also know that it can be said you can’t

please everyone. I have a wonderful support system around me (some who have even read my

book and are nice enough to say they like it) to feed me these compliments and pieces of

advice.

This is just an honest confession about what it’s like to go through the process of getting a book

published. In two weeks, I’ll have nowhere to hide. Diamonds will be out there in the world.

Exciting – yes, definitely. But terrifying – absolutely!